Leave it to me to have the most stereotypical of LA experiences, the minute I get back in town. No, I wasn’t beaten by the cops or “discovered” as the next reality TV star, but if I had downed a couple more mojitos and had a bit more of the old Hollywood schmoozitude, those would have both been possibilities.
I landed in Burbank and caught a super shuttle to Hollywood (ish) to meet up with Johnny and the rest of the booze-hounds. Johnny (actually, his alter ego: IV Legend — superstar DJ) had been booked for a private party at the posh restaurant / lounge / nightclub, Life on Wilshire, so of course, a few friends and I were able to pull the “I’m with the DJ” line and sneak in to the party. To be fair, we aren’t star-fuckers, (more likely, we’re star-fucker-fuckers) and we didn’t really care about rubbing elbows with Hollywood hotshots –Life is our neighborhood bar, and Johnny could get us in, so…why not?
We maneuvered past the bouncer and bellied up to the bar for a round of something corrosive and took a look around the dimly light room. The place was full of B-listers with names like “that black dude from Reno 911″ and “the kid from Big Love” and “that guy looks kinda familiar…maybe we went to highschool togeether.” I mean, it was a real who’s-who of who-the-fuck-are-these-people.
There were a couple of big names there, like the guy who played superman (Brandon Routh, not Christopher Reeve) and comedian Nick Swardson (he is awesome, by the way. check this out!)– the party was actually for their birthdays. Also in attendance was Kumar of White Castle fame.
In related news, I ate at White Castle for the first time ever while I was in Ohio! And yes, it was glorious.
So yeah, boozing with B-listers (we really kept to ourselves), and enjoying white castle burgers. Thats all for today.
I’ll leave you with a quote from now “serious” actor and star of K-ville, Anthony Anderson, in his role as Burger Shack Employee:
Just thinking about those tender little White Castle burgers with those little, itty-bitty grilled onions that just explode in your mouth like flavor crystals every time you bite into one… just makes me want to burn this motherfucker down.
Burn it down, brother. Burn it down.